I miss self portraits. After a day of tedious design projects, nothing feels better than to pull out the tripod and play, working toward a simple, finite goal: one good image. There’s something so satisfying about preserving these little moments in time. Knowing that no matter what the rest of the day holds, I captured the way the afternoon light fell through our bedroom window. Caught it. Mine forever.
It’s been a while! For the past I-don’t-know-how-many months, my website has been in “under construction” mode, even though nothing remotely constructive has been going on. What’s funny is that even though I’ve been off the blogging scene for way long enough to become irrelevant, not a day goes by when I don’t think, I really need to post something.
The writing urge follows me everywhere, through every age and season of life. And the words always find an outlet… Just not here, usually.
I’m kind of weird about the internet. I know it seems contradictory, especially since my website uses my first and last name, but the idea of sharing things publicly has always freaked me out. It’s not that I don’t have things to share — I’ve imagined returning to blogging many times — it’s just the fear of being “out there” and Google-able and posting my thoughts for the world to read (and possibly stalk) that gets me. But in the end, the community is worth it.
So a quick update about the state of things: About a year ago, I took a break from photography to open a graphic design shop for photographers, which has since then kind of morphed into a website design shop. It’s still more of a side project than anything right now, but it’s something I’d been wanting to do for a while, so I’m happy it’s finally out in the world for people to enjoy. I’m excited to continue growing it alongside my other creative endeavors.
Of course photography is still a part of my daily life, but I’m no longer shooting weddings and have taken all my old portfolio galleries down until I have some more recent work to show off.
I hope to finally make a habit of this blogging thing and not be so reticent to share. I always admire when other people have the courage to be open, even when they’re not perfect and their words make them cringe a few months later.
All that to say, I’m back. And I’m really happy about it.
There’s something to be said for the in-between: the moments that hang in the space between here and there, that exist quietly in the background of all our plans and schemes.
Like a chilly morning in the middle of a warm week – still not cool enough for a sweater, but enough to make you think the next time you open the door. Like running out of things to ask your husband about his day because grad school is winding down and the new projects are few and far between. Like the way we talk about the future now – maybe not quite bravely, but without the innocent carelessness of our newlywed days.
One foot here, one foot there. Looking forward (because how can you not?), but content to soak in this season for just a little while longer.